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S.KRAUSE

Important Questions

The Real questions in Life....

  1. If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter?
  2. If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
  3. If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex in the box?
  4. When a cow laughs does milk come up its nose?
  5. Why do they put braille on the number pads of drive-through bank machines?
  6. How did a fool and his money GET together?
  7. If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon on the pan?
  8. How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
  9. If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
  10. What's another word for thesaurus?
  11. Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
  12. What do they use to ship styrofoam?
  13. Why is abbreviation such a long word?
  14. Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container?
  15. Why do kamikazee pilots wear helmets?
  16. How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?
  17. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
  18. Does 'virgin wool' come from sheep the shepherd hasn't caught yet?
  19. When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
  20. Does fuzzy logic tickle?
  21. Do blind eskimoes have seeing-eye sled dogs?
  22. Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the special Olympics?
  23. Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
  24. Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
  25. If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?
  26. Why call it "take" a dump, when you leave something behind?
  27. What was the best thing before sliced bread?