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Booze and Spam

I managed a trip out to Woodman's but nearly ran out of time due to a delay, a bit of a traffic jam behind an old lady and her cart in the frozen meat and fish section. Thereafter I ended up in a checkout line with an elderly woman (80+); I'm glad she had exact change and didn't resort to writing a check. I made it back to the bus in time.

My bus to the transfer point arrives at 10–12 after, and I need a few minutes to cross the street and parking lot to get to the store. The next bus back leaves at a quarter to, so I have about twenty minutes of shopping before I need to get to the checkout line, unless I want to spend a whole hour there.

I needed some Worcester(shire) sauce for meat loaf and similar items, but every brand available contained HFCS, even the official brand, Lea and Perrins, in its paper wrapping. So I just went for a cheap version.


I do not recall the exact recipe for creating a coffee liqueur that tastes as good as Kahlua but which costs about one third as much. The approximation is as follows.

Bring five cups of water and about 1 cup instant coffee to a boil; simmer about ten minutes. Add four cups of water, two cups of granulated sugar, and two cups of corn syrup. Go another ten minutes and remove from heat.

Add one tablespoon of vanilla and a vanilla bean, or just go for about two tablespoons of vanilla extract. Once the liquid is room temperature, add one liter (one bottle) of grain alcohol (190 proof) to create a drink that is stronger than coffee liqueur; if this is not available, Bacardi 155 is a good alternative, and produces a beverage that is about as strong as regular coffee liqueur.

Once the liquid is mixed, let it sit for a while. Then pour into three bottles and refrigerate. A day later it is quite drinkable, but it is really good after a week.

The part of the recipe about which I am not certain is the amount of water, which at first seems a bit on the low side—9 cups of water, before reduction, and 2 of corn syrup, so let's just say 10 cups of liquid, which would be five pints or two and a half quarts, perhaps two quarts if we boil off enough, and then a liter of booze. Since in the end we want three bottles, so about three liters / three quarts, this recipe is close ... tinker at will (at least until I get something more precise).

Spam/Scam of the day:

I love all the variations on the Nigerian 419 scam that are out there. They are morality tales, really, which is perhaps another reason (besides stupidity) why people actually fall for them.

From: eeee111@myway.com
Subject: Life Experience.
Date: January 4, 2007 4:53:51 AM CST

Dear Friend,

I am Esther Johnson from London dying from CANCER OF THE LUNGS out of Ignorance. I smoked for year out of fun and never knew it will destroy me.

This disease has caused a deep harm to my lungs, my lungs are destroyed and no more responding to treatment.The doctor checked/Confirmed that my immune is no more resistance and will pass away soonest.

The most painful thing is that I don't have a Child of my own to continue from where I stopped in life due to reckless life that I lived. I beg you in the name of God to help me take possession of the funds $6.2m which I deposited in a safe firm as my new beneficiary for legitimate claims for the purpose of helping the less privileged ones crying for help.

This information will be needed from you to enable me forward them to the firm as my new beneficiary for immediate claims in your favor.


Thanks and may the good lord uplift you in all that you lay hands upon.

Reply me alternatively through this email address:


Esther Johnson.

Poor Esther is dying not due to ignorance, but due to Ignorance ... of CANCER OF THE LUNGS, not mere lung cancer, which is also quite the death sentence, or so I hear. Her body is so fucked that adjectives have become nouns in her presence, and she has a failed immune. She has little time remaining—by the time you or I read this it could be too late—and will die not just soon, but soonest (not just sooner, even).

Since I do not own a MOBILE PHONE I am unable to aid poor Esther Johnson, but perhaps you, dear reader, possess a kinder soul than I (and a MOBILE PHONE).

—January 4 2007